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Eating moose poo could happen to anyone


 

justinressell/Flickr (with added illustration by J. Allen)

Did you hear about those Grade 8 kids in Manitoba who got tricked into eating moose poo on a school canoe trip? One young man had to run to the river and rinse out his mouth, once he realized it wasn’t the delicious trail mix-like snack of berries and grass that AN ADULT promised it to be. Another victim, a girl, had trouble getting the poo out of her braces.

Getting tricked into eating poo could happen to anyone. One time Stevie Hancock up the street told me that those little tasty looking nubs in the cage of his pet rabbit were chocolate-covered raisins. “Why not?” I thought. Another time, someone tricked me into eating tempeh, a soy-based protein source popular among vegans. Gross!

What I’m trying to say is that I hope these kids don’t feel so bad. People have always eaten pretty crazy stuff throughout history. The Romans? Whatever! I’m talking  peacock tongues and flamingo brains!

And in modern times, too. Like duck fetus eggs and bird’s nest soup, like donkey penis and bull testicles, like rodents and tarantulas. Like tuna eyeballs. TUNA EYEBALLS! They’re as big as a tennis ball!

So buck up, kids. Next to escamoles–the larvae of giant black ants that are often stuffed into tacos, with a little “guac”–moose poo doesn’t sound half-bad.


 

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