10 (fictional but not wholly unbelievable) Canadian sex acts

We wonder what Pierre Berton would make of this imaginative list.

In an episode of the American sitcom How I Met Your Mother, several characters try to guess the sexual exploits of one of their friends and a certain “Canadian celebrity.”

Here are just a handful of sex acts from www.canadiansexacts.org, a website created by the show’s producers, but which claims to have been developed by the “Informational Advancement Directorate of Ontario (ADO) and Bureau des Renseignements de Quebec (BRQ), two branches of the Ministry of Community Wellness and Public Service”:

 1.    Saskatoon Totem Pole

 2.    Sticky Flapjack

 3.    Manitoba Milk Bag

 4.    Two-Handed Zamboni

 5.    Reverse Rick Moranis

 6.    Montreal Petting Zoo

 7.    Northwest Passage

 8.    One-Tusked Walrus

 9.    Full Mountie

 10.    Musty Goaltender

See also: 10 cities leading Canada in adult toy sales

Have you ever wondered which cities have the most bars, smokers, absentee workers and people searching for love? What about how Canada compares to the world in terms of the size of its military, the size of our houses and the number of cars we own? The nswers to all those questions, and many more, can be found in the first ever Maclean’s Book of Lists.

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