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Caption Challenge: Special Olympic Edition

Play along and win a prize


 

One silver medalist wearing a well-earned smile of satisfaction. One prime minister wearing mittens. Come up with a funny-type caption for this picture. The winner, to be decided Tuesday by popular vote, gets a genuine piece of overpriced Olympics merchandise direct from Whistler! (Translation: My new Quatchi thong doesn’t fit.)


 

Caption Challenge: Special Olympic Edition

  1. Holy crap, holy crap, holy crap, I can't believe this is happening to me… (shake, shake) I mean… "this is wonderful…for Canada, thank you!"

  2. So… any ideas for the next budget?

  3. "I have a tongue that matches your medal."

    "Thank God Jacques didn't pro-Rogge your event."

    "Chretien strangles the plebes; I cuddle them"

  4. "No, I said come ninety then I come ten! You don't go the whole hundred! My mouth was open, Stephen. You overeager son of a… BLECH!"
    (Quote from the movie Hitch)

  5. Er…note to Harper's personal milliner…lose the toque…now!

  6. "The deal is closed then, my sweet! Your hand in marriage, and in return your father may keep the family farm! BWHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!"

  7. "So… how do you feel about Cigars?"

  8. "I need you to need me, I want you to want me, I'm begging you to beg me'

    'DON'T PANIC! I'm mostly harmless'

    ''Admit you were dozing a little on that run or I'll tickle you with these mittens'

    'I don't want to go into details, I'm just very happy and I feel very blessed to have an experience as precious as this. I'm so glad it wasn't sexual.'

    'I've always been stupidly settling for second best too, but with you in my arms I can pretend, next time stop thinking and just do it, it works for me'

  9. Take a good look at this smile, silver-medalist-of-mine, because that's my monthly quota.

  10. Any moment now Harper's going to rip open that parka and reveal his complete Captain Canada ensemble.

    "Second my dear,well done! But i think'll handle the jumps from here on in"!

  11. "Wait till this photo is published! It looks like I actually possess the ability to show emotion!"

  12. "What do you mean you're already seeing Adam Giambrone?"

  13. "I don't care how much of the popular vote you got, no means NO"

  14. "Ok… hugging, I can do this. They covered this in the handbook on how to be human…. God! Think Stephen! Think! Ok right arm here, left arm there… now smile… I think I've got the hang of this!"

  15. Silence is golden

  16. On the eve of Budget 2010, the Prime Minister used the occasion to bring attention to a stimulus measure expected to headline the second phase of the government's action plan: The Home Wrecker Tax Credit.

    (Keep your legal bills..uh..er…..receipts come tax season)

  17. "It's okay Jenn, Laureen thinks I'm in Question Period"

  18. Canada just won gold, and we are celebrating as a nation?

    Quick lets make fun of Harper.

    • Yes, let's

      • Okay by me.

    • Biff, you really don't have a sense of humour do you? You poor soul!

  19. "You smell like warm kittens my dear."

  20. "You know, my dear, you still have a chance for the *ahem* gold."

  21. "How'd you like to ski on top of this mogul?"

  22. "You know Clinton and Monica met when the US government was in a shutdown…"

  23. You know, I was speaking to Tiger Woods the other day, and ….

  24. Just think about it Jen…….Mrs. Heil-Harper!

    • Ha, ha, ha!

    • When he has a majority, that's what everyone will have to say.

  25. All Heil the king, baby!

  26. I normally don't congratulate first losers, but you look better than Ignatieff.

  27. Quick, let's get this photo op over with! All this Canada garb is making my skin burn! Aieeee! It burns! It burns!

  28. The thrill of victory….The agony of DFAIT.

  29. This'll teach Laureen to spend so much time with those d*mn cats!

    • This'll teach Laureen to spend so much time with that d*mn John Baird!

  30. "Oh, Rose Marie, I love you!
    I'm always dreaming of you!"

  31. You know Jen, this might sound sound crazy but I believe. I believe that together we'll fly. I believe in the power of you and I.

  32. A public makeout worked so well for Al Gore!

  33. Ah….so "this"is what recalibration means!

  34. Wanna touch my cardigan?

  35. "Oh! Thank you! Thank you for all the support over the years, ever since I was a little girl! Thank you for all the financial and emotional support, and thank you for bringing in all that snow!"

    "Just doin' mah job, missy…"

  36. Off-camera, a handler is heard speaking urgently, "Mr. Prime Minister! You must have misheard us at the briefing. During your publicity campaign, we wanted you to kiss babies, not babes!!"

  37. … of all the ski hills in all the world, you had to backflip into mine

  38. Nice bum Stevie!

  39. "You remember when I told all my MP's not to go to the Olympics? Those suckers!"

  40. This is what I really meant when I said raise firewalls around Alberta. Come feel my heat baby!

  41. Despite the silver, you'll always be gold in my heart

  42. Yeah you like that fur rim, hey? I'm looking forward to seeing yours.

  43. Whoops! Poked ya with my ski pole! Tee hee.

  44. Own the podium, baby.

  45. Oh my big bad wolf…err I mean Mr. Harper, what big chins you have

  46. "If you like that, wait'll you see the unwritten constitution."

  47. A nation suddenly realizes that their PM's head size rivals that of Rosie O'Donnell's.

  48. Those tranks sure give me smolderin' eyes!

  49. Harper: "if you come over later I will model Feshcuk's Quatchi thong. He told me it doesn't fit."

  50. Harper was overheard whispering to an aid "her eyes, are closed, she is leaning in…. wtf am i supposed to do again?"

  51. You had me at Heil-o

  52. Harper quoting Feschuk: "Play along and win a prize…"

  53. If I was twenty years younger and single, I would SO shake your hand…

  54. "Good job Jenn! I like following the Americans' lead too."

  55. Is that a mogul in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

    • You guys are bad! Sorry to assume you're a male Chris and Maggiesfarmboy below.

  56. "Get the hell away creepy old guy"

  57. "Photo op this!" followed by a swift knee to the groin…

  58. C'mon, give me the jersey! My blue sweater doesn't work anymore!

  59. While not quite the iconic 'sailor kissing a nurse in Time Square' shot that Stephen Harper had been hoping for, the picture did manage to capture the imagination of Scott Feschuck blog readers.

  60. "You want gold, I want my ass grabbed – I think we can work something out."

  61. Aw crap, Bilodeau gets the gold…. I get a grope.

  62. Jennifer Heil and Jimmy Kimmel appear together in a skit set to air on an upcoming episode of Jimmy Kimmel Live.

  63. Does this scarf smell like Chloroform to you?

  64. Never wear black without The Blue, Selsun Blue

  65. Coincidentally, the Baboon is the most dangerous Monkey and smiles before attacking as well.

  66. It's just a bit too creepy.

  67. To come in second and be much beloved, or to come in first and not so much…. Such is the paradox of humanity.

  68. "Cha too ma laya conky, ya neema loka nyan."

    (Translation from Huttese: "Soon you will learn to appreciate me.")

  69. Wow, new Scope Winterfresh sure did make you kissably fresh!

  70. Jenn: "Of all the ski hills in all the towns in all the world, he walks into mine."

  71. (no caption, just Pachelbel's "Canon" playing in the background.)

  72. Monty Burns does the big O

  73. Imagining the response a gold would have elicited from the PM, Heil began to feel pretty darn good about silver, after all.

    • ….and was sure that bronze would have been just that much safer.

  74. "In the Spring a young man's fancy lightly turns to thoughts of love.

    Then her cheek was pale and thinner than should be for one so young,
    And her eyes on all my motions with a mute observance hung."

    Tennyson

  75. "Thank heavens I'm wearing this heavy coat. Otherwise she'd feel the power of the PMO."

  76. "How'd you like to join my After-Party and check out the liquored Cabinet?"

  77. I just want to show how grateful I am for winning me my first gold medal!

    Bob and Doug and me think that was some great goofy, eh?

    How about we get together for dinner sometime? I know this great-out-of-the-way place that serves fresh seal meat, recalibration perogies, and the house specialty, redacted Ratatouille. It's called the House of Commons, and trust me darlin', there are no questions asked.

  78. "How'd you like to join my After-Party and check out the liquored Cabinet?"

  79. "Geri Hall is only acting when she looks at you like this"

  80. and I thought the free house was a perk of being the prime minister

  81. "No, no, Stephen. This is the Mogul Mambo, not the Prorogue Polka…" (only Mama is allowed to call him Stevie)

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