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Five and a Half Things about the Guergis interview

Scott Feschuk: “At points during last night’s interview, it was as though she was trying to tuck Peter Mansbridge into bed”


 

1. It probably doesn’t help Helena Guergis’s case that whenever I hear her voice I think of the little Poltergeist lady. Now clear your minds. It knows what scares you. IT HAS FROM THE VERY BEGINNING!!

(This isn’t a joke. I am deeply unnerved by her Soft Voice. At points during last night’s interview, it was as though she was trying to tuck Peter Mansbridge into bed. “I guess I could be naïve, Peter. Yeah. <softer> Yeah. <softer> And then the baby unicorn and the fairy princess were bestest friends for all time. The end.”)

1.5 When Guergis made reference to watching her career implode on “the news hour at 11 o’clock,” I admired Peter Mansbridge’s restraint in not tearing off his microphone and hollering, “Why don’t you go cry to your best friend Lloyd Robertson then?”

2. Allowing Mansbridge to view the videotape of her alleged meltdown at the Charlottetown airport was smart – no boot throwing? WHAAA?? –because it allowed her to begin the interview with a demonstration of credibility. Two obvious questions: Why didn’t she do this sooner? And more important, can we all go to CATSA head office and watch videotapes of ourselves going through airport security? Because I’m pretty sure that tape of one of the screeners at Toronto island airport “accidentally” knocking me in the nuts with his handheld wand would be a hoot.

3. The credibility that Guergis built up eroded when she talked about her husband, Rahim Jaffer. She came off here as overly coached, relying on wounded sentences that (I’d wager) were crafted for her by an advisor. “I have no reason to believe my husband would lie to me, my husband would not want to hurt me or harm me in any way.”

Little of what she said about Jaffer was convincing. In one breath, she stated that she knew with absolute certainty that Jaffer never used her office or resources to exploit his Conservative connections to try and score government grants and financing. In the next, she said she has little clue what her husband’s job actually entails. “I know he works in green technologies. I know he knows a lot of people.” I know he’s a biped. I have a strong hunch he owns several pairs of pants.

And then this: According to Guergis, Jaffer has “no idea” how the cocaine ended up in his pocket on the night he was arrested. Permit me to help you with that one, Helena: He put it there. Did I just blow your mind?

4. Guergis was pretty adamant that she’s never done cocaine or any other drug. Ever. Don’t we have to believe her? I think we do unless someone comes forward with something other than rumour and hearsay. Like maybe an HD video of her with coke and strippers – but you know, classy-like.

5. The part where she cried made me uncomfortable. I briefly switched the channel to CSI: Miami. A murdered soccer Mom? I guess the killer got a <removes sunglasses> real kick out of this.


 

Five and a Half Things about the Guergis interview

  1. I found it facinating that the MSM including the CBC, CTV, Star, Globe, NP who have been destroying her reputation for the past month are now trying to bring her into their caring comfy arms, and she is going for it!

    How pathetic they both are, they deserve each other

    • Well, remember the old song: "Love, exciting and new…. Come aboard, we're waiting for you!…"

      • "and love, won't hurt anymore… it's an open smile, on a friendly shore!" Oh, wait…

  2. My apologies. Shall I use shorter words and abandon all pretense of civilized discourse?

    I'll wait while you look up the words…

    • No, you just keep spewing out insults, I'll 'splain you some evidence:

      Canadian "journalist": Miss Coulliard, you married a full patch biker, partnered with bikers in business and socialized with bikers.
      Julie Couilliard: Well I'm certainly not a "biker chick".
      Canadian "journalist": Agreed. Why do you suppose Prime Minister Harper hates democracy?

      Canadian "journalist": Ms May, this tape clearly shows you saying that you agree Canadians are "stupid".
      Elizabeth May: I know, it *sounds* like I said that? But I really said the opposite.
      Canadian "journalist": Are Conservatives barbarians?

      Canadian "journalist": Miss Dhalla, this Bollywood DVD that you starred in clearly shows you displaying nudity and according to industry figures sold over two million copies in India, contrary to your claims to have never done a nude film.
      Ruby Dhalla: It was digitally altered by the conservative media, that's not a DVD in your hand.
      Canadian "journalist": Share how making art feels.

      Jeez, I can see why there are so few women in politics, "journalists" are just soooooooooooo tough on them, lolololololololol…

        • Let's not argue. We agree that the job of the PM of a G8 country should not involve "comforting" MPs he has booted out of caucus, and that the Liberal leader's job does not include nurturing those who would organize to take his job, amirite?

          For example, Jean Chretien recounts his time working as Trudeau's Justice Minister: sitting in an airplane waiting to take off, Chretien remarks "It's raining outside." Trudeau replies "When it's raining, it usually occurs outside." Such hide toughening character building moments drove Chretien to win three consecutive majority governments as Liberal leader and Dhalla, Guergis, and others would do well to emulate Chretien's manly, noble stoicism in the face of adversity.

  3. " Her track record as a minister speaks for itself. "
    The Peter Principle, verified… Yet again!

  4. Actually, we are pretty tired of all the other scandals, too!

  5. HA HA HA ! I loved that clip.
    Yup, both Washington and Ottawa need a good
    Person In Machiavellian Planning…. (P.I.M.P.)

  6. If politicians had to meet the simple standards that, say, a CR-04 or a PM-01 (for example) have to meet at, say, Revenue Canada/CCRA/CRA… why then, we would have no Leaders! No politicians.
    Somehow, I cannot for the life of me figure out if this would be a good thing.
    (The No Politicians part, not the Simple Test part…)
    So, Oh, great, wonderful, honourable, and all knowing Mr. Feschuck… can you tell us?
    Elucidate unto us, please, kind sir.

  7. On a positive note she seems to have stopped the compulsive blinking she used to do sitting behind Harper in QP.

  8. Ah, yes, the vaunted Frank Graves inspired Liberal genius plan to win the next election by crusading against Sarah Palin and morality; we're shakin' in our CSA approved steel toe work boots, bub.

  9. I'm as anti-Conservative as they come, but: a) they don't have a child. b) There is no "Children Ministry". (Though if the Tories had a majority , they'd create a Minisiter of "Will No-one Think of the Children?") c) Who gives a crap who his dealer is, because d) it came from South America and/or e) drugs should be decriminalized. Still glad the Tories are embarrassed though!

  10. Did anyone else notice that when she got out of the vehicle with Mansbridge, before the interview, she nonchalantly and without thought handed off her purse to her waiting assistant? She obviously believes that her staff are there to wait on her. This says a lot about the person; and perhaps why she went through so many staff members and drivers.

  11. That was no handheld wand. HEYYOOOOOOOHH

  12. See: Nixon, Richard M., "Checkers". Washington, D.C., 1952.

  13. I'm sorry… you lost me. How does this relate to busty hookers?

  14. Married to a Muslim. Did she convert??

  15. Amen!!!

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