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‘Please stop insulting us’


 

Dan Gardner makes a foray into the speechwriting business.

Look, we’re all adults here so I’m going to stop talking as if Canada is a nation of five-year-olds. There is no Santa Claus. Rex was not sent to a farm in the country. I was doing considerably more than giving your mum a vigorous hut that morning when you walked in. And my decision about an election will be based on whether it’s good for our party. And me. Most of all, me. Yes, I will keep the national interest in mind but, you know, if you look at the entire long history of democratic politics you will see that the national interest is always an exact fit for the interest of the politician who’s talking about the national interest. You think that’s a coincidence? Go get a psychology textbook and look up “cognitive dissonance.” And grow up, people. Like I said, we’re all adults here.


 

‘Please stop insulting us’

  1. "Rex" being a loved family pet, hopefully, and not Mr. Murphy.

    • Thank heavens dad wasn't giving ol' Rex a vigorous hut that morning when I walked in.

  2. Too late, Mr. Gardner. Our various elites are firmly convinced that explaining matters of substance that are well within the ability of anyone with a high school education to understand if only they're communicated clearly and candidly (by people who actually understand them, which too often eliminates most journalists, economists, consultants and politicians, who just pretend to) is beneath them. That's why important people get to flatter themselves by nodding in approval over the elegance and sophistication of exotic derivatives (which were in fact, complicated nonsense), while the rest us get treated like two year olds.

  3. What the heck is a "vigorous hut"? That sounds more depraved than euphemistic.

    • It's a combination of a "hug" and a "rut". Like hugging, but more… enthusiastic.

  4. Combined with a vigorous jabba, it's something no child should see.

  5. Hint: "t" is next to "g" on the keyboard…

    • That's the more likely explanation. I was trying to conjure up a quarterback and his center, but it wasn't quite an orthodox image, such as you would expect in this kind of analogy. I suspect you are correct.

  6. Hut…Jabba….Princess Liea…. See, I told you it was depraved!

  7. LOL!

  8. I know. But that's not as funny to point out.

  9. Look, we're all adults here…

    Unfortunately that's just not true.

    • Yeah, some of us have a bare arse for an avatar.

  10. I thought "farm in the country" was a euphemism for "Betty Ford Clinic."

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