Q: Tiger, what club should I use off the 7th at Pinecrest? A: I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry. - Macleans.ca
 

Q: Tiger, what club should I use off the 7th at Pinecrest? A: I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.


 

A reminder that there’s still time to ask a question for this week’s Mailbag, which appears tomorrow. I’m toying with the idea of answering all the questions as though I were Tiger Woods, but I’m not sure I can type that much scripted remorse.

Submit your queries below or send them to me at scott.feschuk@macleans.rogers.com.


 
Filed under:

Q: Tiger, what club should I use off the 7th at Pinecrest? A: I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.

  1. Heat death not Heath death…uh-oh created an opening for tasteless Heath Ledger jokes. My bad.

    • I just thought you had a lisp.

      • More like keyboard dyslexia.

  2. "How do you believe the universe will end?"

    Blimey. Sorry to bring the tone down but I was wondering if you would 'snog, shag, marry or avoid' the following women:

    Britney Spears
    Megan Fox
    Cameron Diaz
    Angelina Jolie
    Bar Refaeli
    Heather Graham
    Rhianna
    Pam Anderson

    This is pub game I learned in England. You can use any answer more than once. I thought of this question while watching Rhianna's new video, Hard. I find Rhianna both sexy and scary.

    • "This is pub game I learned in England."

      That you guys once controlled half the globe is something I'll never fully understand. :)

      • Feschuk: SeanS's comment made me think of another question.

        If UK ruled the world with 10,000 bureaucrats and Royal Navy, why does Canada need more than 2 million public employees to run Canada?

        SeanS – I, too, am flabbergasted by my ancestor's history compared to sorry state they are in now.

        • We need 1,9 million to fix the printers when they run out of toner.

    • I am guessing you mean Rihanna?

      • Indeed I am.

        • You are Rihanna? That puts a different spin on things . . .

  3. Dear Scott,

    If obfuscation were an Olympic Sport in Vancouver's 2010 Games, who would take home the gold? And for what?

  4. I think I know the answer to this one: "Why do you hate the troops?"

    • I think that's quickly becoming the meme of the year…

  5. Dear Scott,
    If Lindsay Lohan and Tiger Woods were to have an affair, whose reputation would be the more damaged?

  6. Dear Scott,

    Why doesn't Tiger simply prorogue himself and avoid any additional fallout? Wouldn't that increase his popularity?

    • He did!

      And it didn't.

  7. Dear Scott,

    How can we be sure your posts are not an elaborate environmentalist publicity stunt designed to shame us into giving Tiger Woods the Order of Canada?

    Yours,

    Jack M.

  8. Scott,

    A philosophical/physics question for you. How do you believe the universe will end? Big Crunch? Heath Death? Vacuum metastability event? The Rapture?

    Please enlighten us.

  9. Dear Scott,

    Has Tiger seduced anyone north of the 49h parallel and if so, is this troop bashing.

  10. Dear Tiger,

    If you were watching Elin and Jaimee wrestle in lemon jello, would you prefer the white mini-marshmallows or the coloured ones?

    (I'll stop now)

  11. Dear Scott: If Kirstie Alley can consume two burritos every six minutes, how many burritos could two dozen Kirstie Alleys theoretically consume in half an hour?

  12. Mr. Feschuk;

    In a fight to the death on an unnamed desert planet between Jack "Lovin' The Taliban" Layton's soup strainer and Micheal "Hatin' The Troops" Iggy's eyebrows, who wins… the Gorn's teeth or Shatner's hairpiece?

    Alternatively, Thundercats or He-Man: Who rules superior amongst the 80's afterschool cartoons?

  13. Dear Scott,

    Is my wife sleeping with Tiger Woods?

  14. " Q: Tiger, what club should I use off the 7th at Pinecrest? A: I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry. "

    Never mind, i see your putter is in use.

  15. Dear Tiger,

    Jane Taber: Hot or Not Hot?