your friday caption contest -

your friday caption contest


Recognize Steve Guttenberg? Famous in the ’80s for starring in terrible movies? Infamous in the ’90s for no longer starring in movies because his movies in the ’80s were so terrible? Butt of more Whatever Happened To… jokes than legwarmers and John Goodman’s ability to see his own penis combined?

Well, some paparazzo recognized Steve Guttenberg and tried to snap his photo – you know, just in case the world abruptly starts revolving the other way and then – boom! – it’s 1987 again and these sweet Guttenberg pics are in demand, baby! Ca-ching!!

Point is: Steve Guttenberg did not react well. In fact, he freaked. Screaming ensued. Middle fingers were extended. Punches would have been thrown, leading to the arrival of law enforcement officials, possibly by helicopter – but sadly the black guy from Police Academy wasn’t there to make the appropriate series of sound effects.

The challenge: write a caption for this photograph. The reward: to the victor go the spoils, the spoils in this case being two (2) DVDs from my own personal DVD collection that I have never even watched because I bought the DVDs thinking I wanted to watch them but when I got home it turns out, no, I actually didn’t.

I don’t think the DVDs star Steve Guttenberg, but then again how would I know?

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your friday caption contest

  1. you wouldn’t like me when i’m angry… although come to think of it, you didn’t like me when i wasn’t angry

  2. Mad? I’m not mad! I’m doing the Tango jackass!

  3. Goddamn it – I’m a stone cutter and I will not be treated like this.

    btw, greatest Simpsons episode ever.

  4. While wearing his official Liberal Party of Canada green hat, Steve was quoted as saying;

    “It’s not a shit plan!!! It’s a shift plan!!!”

  5. ‘Mama said knock you out’?

  6. “Why yes, I am extremely happy about the good ratings that King of Queens is getting!”

  7. Do these teeth LOOK capped?

  8. “That’s SERGEANT Mahoney to you!”

  9. Dancing WILL TO bring about world peace!!

  10. I AM NOT Joe Piscopo!

  11. I told you once, a—–e, don’t interupt me when I’m listening to Britney on my ipod.

  12. No. You first detected the pungent odour, ergo, you delt it.

  13. “Cocoon: The Return” DID NOT suck like a Hoover!!

  14. I guess the Gut(t)enberg family has had a change of heart about the press. Oh how far they have fallen.

  15. Because i have important business to take care of this afternoon, such as laughing non-stop for three straight hours that the toronto blue jays actually just rehired cito gaston and it wasn’t a prank or dare or piece of performance art, i’m going to declare an early end to the contest and point of Almighty Wand of Victory (ie. my finger) at Shannon for the Joe Piscopo gag. Rarely have the words “It’s funny because it’s true” more accurately summarized a joke.

    Send me your address via the email link atop this posting, Shannon, and two great – or possibly terrible for all i know – DVDs will find their way to you.

  16. This one’s for the poop commercials, Shatner!