Man enough to pull off a quad?

Men’s figure skating, with its international intrigues, plunging necklines, corsets and divas has reached the point, say enthusiasts, where Blades of Glory seems less like satire, and more like cinéma vérité.

A war of words is being waged heading into tonight’s (likely) U.S.-Russia showdown for Olympic gold.

It’s all about the risky, tricky-to-land quadruple jump. And the manliness of those who can pull it off.

Evgeny Plushenko, the Russian—the putative favourite—had a quad in his short program, Tuesday. Evan Lysacek, the American, and reigning world champion, did not.

“Without the quadruple, I’m sorry, but it’s not men,” Plushenko, said Tuesday, shortly after executing night’s only quad—and grabbing an early lead.

Oh, snap.

So Evan can only triple-twirl. Ease up, I say. The guy took to the ice in a feathered, Vera Wang unitard. That’s balls.