TJ Hooker

(Hey, it counts as CanCon because Shatner is involved.) The intro to the Aaron Spelling/William Shatner collaboration TJ Hooker was selected earlier this year by The Popcorn Trick as the awesomest of all ’80s action-show intros. The author gives it the following score on the ’80s action scale: Action: 9; Sexiness: 9; Cheesiness: 8; Homoeroticism: 9; Intangibles: 10; Total: 45, beating out the runner-up, Riptide, by 5 points. And, indeed, the intro to TJ Hooker is always glorious; in every version looks like somebody took every disreputable television show ever made and mixed it all together in a cocktail of shirtlessness, bralessness, toupees, stunt doubles, flipping cars and Mark Snow theme music. But we can’t just leave it there, because this show ran for five seasons, and every one had a slightly different intro. So which one is the greatest triumph of all that makes television Not Good For You?