Barack's Vineyard: More photos as the Presidential visit nears - Macleans.ca

Barack’s Vineyard: More photos as the Presidential visit nears

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Only two days until Barack Obama and his family arrive on Martha’s Vineyard for a week’s vacation, and some of the locals are getting ticked. Frankly, it’s hard to blame them. They’re ticked that the President’s arrival via helicopter will be closed to the public (unlike during Bill Clinton’s many, many visits). They’re ticked at what many perceive as overly strict security measures banning certain air traffic. They’re ticked that the White House is signaling that the President won’t be wandering the streets and shops like Clinton used to do. Plus – and this is just cruel – it’s been revealed that Geraldo Rivera arrives tomorrow. There’s only so much a citizenry can take.

Meanwhile, I’ve snapped some more photos of Obama-related merchandise and displays on the island. Think of it as a vacation slideshow, but without that slide of me in my open bathrobe “accidentally” getting mixed in there – you know, just to see if you’re interested.

barackn
When T-shirt slogan designers sit down to brainstorm the visit of a major celebrity, I believe they do so with a checklist. And right at the top of the checklist? The question: Can we, in any way, use the name of the visiting individual in verb form? One hundred per cent of the time the answer is yes.

bam

Sure, why not? (Warning: “Bounce Back Action” may not function during health-care debate.)

tote 3tote 1tote 2

Aside from on T-shirts and in the private, late-night fantasies of Katie Couric, Barack Obama tends to appear most frequently on tote bags. This is so Americans can more easily carry their hopes and their dreams to the Change Depot, where they are transformed into reality.

air obama

Act quickly if you want to own this T-shirt of the American President dunking his Hope Ball over the Power Forward of Tyranny.

KISS
Obama as Paul Stanley? Makes sense. That means Joe Biden is Ace Frehley and Nancy Pelosi is that annoying Beth bitch who keeps nagging Peter Criss to come home.

midnight

This piece is in the window of Midnight Farm, the Vineyard Haven shop owned by Carly Simon. The part I enjoy most is how the artist clearly began to run out of inspiring, hope-based words to place alongside the President. The theme starts out strong enough – “change,” “together,” “believe” – but peters out rather noticeably when we get to “green” and “cooperate.” Another few inches of canvas to fill and there may have been the need to paint the words “niceness” and “likes kittens.”

official
Is this really the “official” shirt of the presidential visit? Probably not. But there’s no doubt it’s the official shirt of Hillary Clinton being drawn with an undignified amount of cleavage.

bobama

To the question, “Of all the Obama-themed shirts for sale on Martha’s Vineyard, which shirt will make me look most like a tool?” we at long last have a definitive answer.

peppers

This has nothing to do with Obama, but I thought you’d all like to be informed that Doug Liman – director of Swingers, Mr. and Mrs. Smith and The Bourne Identity – won first place for his hot peppers yesterday at the Martha’s Vineyard Fair.

high hopes

Also at the Fair, I came upon this portrait of the First Family, entitled High Hopes. Question: Why can’t the dog fly? I can only assume that the artist thought: “Okay, President Obama has the power of flight. That’s just science. And through marriage and procreation, he’d logically be able to pass on that ability to his wife and daughters. But the dog? Fly? That’s just crazy talk. It’d spoil the painting’s whole vibe of realism.”

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