Coming soon to a TV channel near you:
[Ominous music. Images of piles of money.]
The federal deficit.
First it looked like it was going to be $34-billion.
Now it looks like it’s going to be $50-billion.
Why can’t it make up its mind?
Why is it flip-flopping like that?
[Abrupt silence. Dramatic pause.]
What is it hiding?
And where’s it been for the last 10 years?
[Music resumes. We see a photograph of the piles of money having martinis with Al Capone, Hitler and Dr. Doom.]
Do you know where the deficit likes to spend its time?
In China. With Chinese bankers who don’t even live in Canada.
[Artist’s crude drawing of a little girl weeping over the lifeless body of her kitty-cat.]
Also, it looks like the deficit might possibly have just killed this girl’s cat maybe.
That’s just sick.
The federal deficit: It’s just in it for itself.