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‘Cross me, and I will quite literally crush you while you sleep’


 

Mark Donald gets inside Stephen Harper’s head.

Of all the political rivals I’ve mercilessly slaughtered over the years, I admit that I miss Stephane Dion the most. I always admired the man’s openness to new ideas and initiatives. I remember on the eve of the 2008 federal election when it became clear that Mr. Dion would be humbled by the onslaught of the Conservative juggernaut, I asked him if it would be appropriate for me to use his physical person as an ottoman in my office. He gave the idea his usual deep contemplation. It didn’t work out of course, but his willingness to consider new ideas really impressed me.


 

‘Cross me, and I will quite literally crush you while you sleep’

  1. Ha, ha. Mark Donald has the perfect comedic touch.

    What can I say about Mr. Jack Layton? He is the yin to my yang, the salt to my pepper, the rabid fifth column red subversive to my bland emotionless pro-business technocrat. I'm proud of the orgy of government-regulated Capitalism that I've been able to get rolling since I was elected, and I wouldn't be fulfilling the solemn duty of my office if I wasn't constantly reminding Canadians that they're just one moustache ride from a Laytonian socialist hellscape. I suppose what I'm saying is that Jack Layton is the sort of man that you just want to punch and never, ever stop punching.

  2. Awesome. Excellent read. Thanks for the link.

  3. This could one soliloquy in a great screenplay.

  4. Excellent satire, thanks for the link.

    • Excellent article : the cool thing without realizing it he probably got my boy Stevie a few votes> MUHAHAHA! – next stop world domination!

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