One day, Ph.D. theses will be written to explain how an odious haircut beloved by bikers, hockey players and David Bowie circa 1972 became a major fashion trend in 2013. But you don’t have to be an anthropologist to figure it out: the mullet’s “business in the front, party in the back” ethic is inverted once it hits the red carpet, where a short front shows off the legs, while a long back maintains formal protocol. Genius! Edgy! Too bad it still looks idiotic.