The kids are all right…up in your business! Parents are finding themselves spending every hour with their little ones as they work from home during the COVID-19 pandemic lockdown, and children are, well, they’re learning some new vocabulary from their heightened exposure to stressed out parents. Maclean’s Ottawa bureau chief Shannon Proudfoot shared a story of her child innocently using a slightly vulgar word and asked for examples of the like from her followers. Here’s the s–t kids say–pandemic edition:
Yesterday my kid turned to me at lunch and sweetly asked “What’s a shitshow?” We may not be doing much homeschooling, but we’re still learning exciting new vocabulary!
Reply with the most true and crass thing your kid has said during lockdown.
— Shannon Proudfoot (@sproudfoot) April 16, 2020
Not swearing but yesterday my 10yo looked up at 5pm and said, what do we think about mai tais tonight? 🍹
— Sasha Emmons (@semmons) April 17, 2020
“Mama you’re not allowed to yell “Jesus Christ!” on Passover.”
— Marsha Lederman (@marshalederman) April 16, 2020
9 year old daughter declaring her pandemic fortitude: “I have good hormones [genes]”.
— Finn O’Hara (@finnohara) April 16, 2020
“I hate to break your balls, but can I have a snack” – Mariella (5, Toronto)
— thebelljar (@thebelljar) April 17, 2020
My 3 year old called my husband a “dummy asstole” when he accidentally let the storm door swing shut and hit her in the head.
— Mer (@MerOutLoud) April 17, 2020
We were discussing travel and I asked my kids where’s the first place they want to go when we can travel again. 10-year old says excitedly, “Disney world!” 8-year old, stone-faced: “Vegas.” 😂
— Genevieve (@genmm28) April 20, 2020
My 8 year old daughter referred to having just had “a shit ton of screen time”. It’s possible that I introduced that unit of measurement in a weak moment but there’s no proof.
— Sheri Hebdon (@sherihebdon) April 17, 2020
My 9yo asked me at bedtime the other day “Mom do you have a will?”, shocked I said, “well that is a good question, why?”, she said “well you have some cool things in this drawer…so I was kinda wondering”.
— Michelle Phoenix (@DrMPhoenix) April 17, 2020